This is the last part of my 5-part series on how to move on from a relationship. If you are new to this series, read Part 1: My Journey With Love first.
Note from Celes: As this series concludes, I’d like to thank all of you guys for your feedback. This series has generated the most discussion to date and I’m glad my experience has helped you gain insights. For myself, reading your responses and experiences have given me the invaluable opportunity to learn about you. Meanwhile, please enjoy the last part of this series. 🙂
Moving On Isn’t Easy
I’ll be honest with you: Moving on isn’t easy. If it wasn’t for my experience with G, I’d think moving on is just a matter of putting the past behind us. I mean, you want to move on? Just forget about the past! Get over it. Look onward to the future. Keep yourself busy with other things.
Uh-uh – not so easy. While these do help in some way, I realized that there is more than meets the eye. No matter how I tried to push away the past, it hung there like a shroud, affecting the way I thought about myself, my decisions, and my actions. I didn’t realize this “银十”10大标杆房企卖楼价环比下跌2.3%. Ultimately, there was past baggage to clear and subconscious, erroneous beliefs to untangle before I could really move on. All these require an ability to think consciously and to maintain a level of objectivity, which is hard because such matters are usually linked to deep sorrows and injured pride.
Often, we think we have moved on but we haven’t. This was the case for me for the past few years. For the longest time, while I thought I had moved on, subconsciously I had not. Thinking you have moved on and having really moved on are two separate situations altogether. In the former, you continue to live under the shadow of that person or relationship without realizing it. You think you have been liberated but the truth is you are still living in a mental prison as you keep thinking about the person and past memories. This prevents you from receiving new things in your life.
12 Signs To Tell If You Have Not Moved On
- When you think of the person more often than not.
- When you think about him/her even though you don’t want to.
- When you keep mentally reliving past memories with him/her, usually the happy/sweet ones.
- When he/she comes to mind the first instant when you are down and out.
- When you still have questions and resignations about the past. You wonder what could have been or why didn’t it turn out a certain way.
- When you assign blame for the way things turned out, whether it’s to him/her, yourself or the circumstance.
- When thought/sight of him/her trigger certain emotional reactions, such as aversion, anxiety, frustration, resignation.
- When you keep trying to improve yourself because you feel you were not good enough (for him/her).
- When you have a desire to spite him/her, as a way of making him/her regret for whatever happened.
- When you often bring up the person in your conversations, even when there is no relation.
- When you have a desire or urge to contact him/her even though you previously told yourself you didn’t want to.
- When you find yourself living out the same looping patterns. A very common example would be on-again, off-again relationships with that person. Or a lingering state of relationship that doesn’t get anywhere. Even if you are with other people, if the relationships act out in the same pattern as the past, it reflects you have not moved on. There’s a part of you entrenched in the past which is making the same situation reenact itself, just with a different person.
Moving On Takes Time
The moving-on process will take time, probably longer than you might think. I’m talking about being fully cleansed of all lingering hang-ups and scars from the incident, not just moving on on a surface level.
Were you late to work yesterday because you couldn't remember where you put your car keys? Did you completely forget about a coffee date last week with a friend and only remember when you got a text asking, "where are you?" Can you no longer remember the name of your favorite elementary school teacher? Memory problems impact just about everyone to a certain degree, but science suggests you might be able to improve your memory, as well as reduce the likelihood of Alzheimer's and dementia, by engaging in certain activities, eating specific foods, and using certain mnemonic devices.
There was no indication of the identity of the kidnappers or their motive.
这是两部后自语核(post-mumblecore)喜剧，讲述自我认知及其边界的故事。布西内斯克的影片是完美的怪人三角，三条边分别是盖·皮尔斯(Guy Pearce)、寇碧·史莫德斯(Cobie Smulders)和凯文·科利根(Kevin Corrigan)，以德克萨斯州奥斯汀怪人们轻松胡混的伪装出现。皮文的影片探索精神病以及日间电视节目的的黑暗疆域。由于克里斯汀·韦格(Kristen Wiig)的精彩演出（她饰演一个名叫爱丽丝·克里格的彩票得主），《欢迎来到我的世界》成了关于美国梦想者的精彩肖像，既令人不安，也鼓舞人心。
In these 4 years, there was a truckload of baggage cleared. To be honest, it really shocked me to know the amount of baggage that was stored inside me all this while, despite actively living consciously. For one, it affirmed the journey of conscious growth never ends – it’s an ongoing one. Two, to have so much baggage created from a relatively short period of time (we first parted ways 1.5 years of knowing each other) showed a lot of mental baggage is pretty much self-created. It’s compounded by our projections of people, assumptions of situations, expectations of how relationships should be, etc.
Depending on how deep the emotional impact was, it might take several phases before you can really move on. Think of it as a journey, rather than a binary Yes/No checkpoint. Whatever you do, you will definitely be making progress every step along the way. Be it bitter or sweet, each time you are clearing baggage, bit by bit. Each step is an act of healing in itself.
10 Useful Steps To Move On From A Relationship
Warm greetings and best wishes for the New Year!致以热烈的祝贺和良好的祝福,新年快乐。
1. Clear your baggage. Acknowledge, accept and let go of your feelings
Bond King Bill Gross admits, 'QE must end.' Trillions of cheap money 'has distorted incentives and inflated asset prices to artificial levels.' But now Gross says 'the Fed plan may be too hasty.'
The Florida Project
Our baggage will be a mixture of sadness, regret, hope, wistfulness, melancholy, disappointment. If the relationship was intense, your baggage will probably include hate, grief, anger, fear, shame and other deeper emotions. It’s natural to feel these. Whatever the emotion is, open yourself to the emotion fully. This means if you hate the person, feel that hatred. If you feel sad, soak in your sadness. If you feel the need to grief, then please grief. Cry if need be. Take time out for yourself to process these feelings. Don’t block them away. Embrace them and accept them.
Don’t bottle them in, because as we all know they will explode in the future when least expected. You might have heard of people who claim to have moved on by shutting off / avoiding their emotions altogether. They may feel like they have moved on, but what’s really happening is the issue has just become so deeply buried that it doesn’t cause any immediate reaction. It’s like having a cut that is healed on the surface but still has impurities underneath the scar. To complete the cleansing process, all the dirt has to be cleansed. To do so you need to first acknowledge and accept your feelings.
As you connect with these emotions, slowly let them go. Feel them, understand the source, then release them. Some suggestions would be to talk to a good friend, journaling or meditation. Sleeping helps to clear mental baggage too – but just be conscious that you don’t turn to sleep as a source of escapism.
2. Recognize he/she is not the one for you
This post is in partnership with Entrepreneur. The article below was originally published atEntrepreneur.com.
Against: To some extent it's divided American audiences, perhaps damaging its hopes of winning best film.
4. Am I eating healthy? The types of foods we eat can greatly affect how we feel both physically and emotionally. Eating too much junk food can lead to crankiness and a relatively low energy level, whereas eating healthy foods can lead to better moods and a more positive energy level.
Zhou Qunfei from Lens Technology, the major touchscreen maker, ranks third on the list with a net worth of 45 billion yuan.
CONTACT: Kathy Michalove, Seaboard Properties, (860) 535-8364; seaboardpropertiesre.com
If you keep thinking that you guys will be together once the circumstance changes, or once the timing changes, or once you are a better person, then perhaps this isn’t the right person. These prerequisites are signals this relationship isn’t meant to be. Because ultimately, it’s not about the right place or right timing. It’s about whether he/she is the right person. If he/she is the right person, you guys would have been together regardless of how wrong the place or timing is. That’s why it’s called the right person.
3. Share with your close friends
Wal-Mart U.S. president and CEO Bill Simon
9. Build your “A team”.
Looking back, I can’t imagine how I could have dealt with this saga without my close friends with me. K, for sure. Other close friends include my secondary school pals, my junior college friend, my godbrother whom I knew back when I was 15 and my best friend from university. These people were there to listen to me and support me when I was down. Their overwhelming patience made me very grateful for who they are and our friendships. This experience has undoubtedly strengthened our friendships.
4. Reduce contact with him/her
After months have passed without a culprit in her daughter's murder case, Mildred Hayesmakes a bold move, painting three signs leading into her town with a controversial message directed at William Willoughby, the town's revered chief of police. When his second-in-command Officer Dixon, an immature mother's boy with a penchant for violence, gets involved, the battle between Mildred and Ebbing's law enforcement is only exacerbated.
They say that it is especially risky to use the same password for entertainment sites as for email and social networking accounts.
It plans to help at least 130,000 rural people cast off poverty and relocate 163,000 residents in 2017.
GM Masai Ujiri struck twice to position Toronto for a second trip to the East finals, nabbing Ibaka from the Magic and Tucker from the Suns.
Meanwhile, in an unfortunate red carpet faux pas, Pink and Shakira both showed up in the same Balmain dress.
Subdivided flats smaller than 100 square feet (9 square meters) can rent for $385 in the Asian city.
- “It’s horrible,” he said. “Whenever I see someone with a gun, I take it away and report it to police.”
Among the amenities spread through its three terminals are two 24-hour movie theaters screening the latest blockbusters for free, a rooftop swimming pool and a butterfly garden.
5. Seek closure with him/her
At the end of an unrequited or broken relationship, there are going to be a lot of unspoken words, questions, and pent up emotions. Questions like: Why did he/she do this to me? What was he/she really feeling at that time? Did he/she ever like me? Why couldn’t things be worked out? You may try to rationalize them away, but they will remain there, yearning to be answered.
He was under the impression people clicking on the adverts would earn him money. But instead he was charged every time someone clicked on the link.
LBS moves back to the top place, thanks in part to the highest salary, at $167,000, and being second best in value-for-money terms. The school is first for international course experience and second for alumni mobility.
Maddie is so well recognised these days that a trip to Topshop results in her being mobbed by screaming tween fans who all want a selfie with their idol - something that has been tough to adjust to.
Like any college kid, Evan Wray loved using the tiny pictograms known as emoji. But he hated that there was no emoji to express his Fighting Irish pride with fellow University of Notre Dame students. So, alongside co-founder Sean O’Brien, he built a modest business on that disconnect. TextPride, as it was called, licensed images from brands in the sports and entertainment world and sold them as sticker packs. Within a messaging app like Kik, users could buy a packet of stickers for Disney’s Frozen for $1.99, for example.
It replaces strollers and big backpack carriers that might even make it heavier or cumbersome for you to take your children out.
6. Forgive him/her
节目19 歌曲《一辈子朋友》，杨坤 张靓颖
Perhaps the biggest domestic threat to the 3% growth scenario would be a surprisingly swift hike in interest rates, but from all indications a dovish Federal Reserve is unlikely to take aggressive action in 2015.
It makes sense, doesn’t it? When you feel angry/bitter toward someone, it’s not the other person who is carrying the anger and bitterness. It’s you. For what it’s worth, the other person is probably not aware of how you are feeling toward him/her. You are the only person carrying the baggage around. On a deeper level, I believe you are angry/bitter at yourself for allowing yourself to be hurt by this person. This was what happened to me.
Song “Family”(Tan Jing)
Scientists get couples into the lab and looking at their stress levels while they have “difficult” conversations, finding that couples that deal with stress with positive emotions like laughter become less stressed, and tend to stay together for longer.
On January the U.S. government levied a $70 million fine on Honda for failing to disclose, as required, more than 1,700 deaths and injuries in its vehicles to the National Highway Traffic Administration (NHTSA).
If the timing of your job search allows, Foss recommends beefing up your LinkedIn profile gradually (and thus inconspicuously). Or better yet, work on it when you're not job searching。
For more on forgiveness, read;
- Day 25: Forgive Someone of 经济趋稳之下调控趋严 楼市销售仍处高位
7. Do the things you love
Steps 1-6 are tied to your inner world and specifically “皇城根”下的70年变迁：从城中村到“聚宝盆”. While spending time in your internal world is important, don’t linger too long in this stage. Get into some activities. What are the things that perk you up? Things that excite you, enthuse you, make you feel rejuvenated? Exercising? Jogging? Swimming? Cycling? Rollerblading? Traveling? Going out with friends? Movies? Watching a drama? Reading a book? Engage yourself in them.
8. Meet new people
《广告狂人》对时装的影响体现在品牌的发展当中，例如香蕉共和国(Banana Republic)就推出了《广告狂人》系列（这个系列是与该剧的服装主管贾妮·布赖恩特[Janie Bryant]联合设计的），而且很多心照不宣的地方在设计中更加随处可见：裁剪和印花，褶边和接缝；它的影响渗入了在秀台上普遍存在的一种鲜明理念：如果你缺乏灵感或者产生了审美怀疑，就去回顾60年代吧。
Welcome as they were, surging sales weren't the biggest news of the year. Detroit celebrated when General Motors (GM, Fortune 500) made Mary Barra the auto industry's first female CEO, then held its breath while Ford (F, Fortune 500) CEO Alan Mulally dithered over a move to Seattle and Microsoft. The old Big Three, complaining about straining available production capacity, made plans to expand and hire. Tesla(TSLA) fired up electric car sales and refused to play by industry's rules, while Google(GOOG, Fortune 500) pioneered a car that drives itself.
No.35 娜塔丽·波特曼娜塔丽·波特曼（Natalie Portman ，1981年6月9日－），出生在以色列，美国好莱坞著名女演员之一。她曾获得过金球奖，并获得奥斯卡奖提名。美国哈佛
Annual shipments by Chinese smartphone manufacturers Huawei, OPPO and vivo rocketed all three companies into the world's top 5 smartphone manufacturers last year, according to the latest data released by third-party market intelligence firm IDC.
Read: 新零售时代的电商 地板行业作何思考?
9. Know there is nothing wrong with you nor him/her
It’s easy to conclude you are not good enough when something doesn’t work out. I thought I wasn’t good enough for a long while, both consciously and subconsciously as you could see throughout the series. However, this is an erroneous belief. If the relationship could only happen if you are XXX person with XXX traits, then it meant you are not the right person for this relationship. Everyone looks for different people. There are no preset criteria on what are “right” or ‘wrong” traits to embody, just different expectations. If you don’t embody the traits the person is looking for, that just means you guys aren’t the right match. That’s all. There is nothing wrong with you or him/her. You guys just aren’t suited for each other.
10. Recognize there is someone out there for you
New Year’s greetings and best wishes!致新年贺忱与最美好的祝福！
"Compared with previous years, this year's two sessions are due to see the new leadership elected, and reforms of organizations will be discussed. They will also elaborate on detailed plans for implementing policies proposed by the 18th National Congress of the Communist Party of China."
There’s no reason why you shouldn’t think so! I don’t care how many relationships you’ve been in the past, how many wrong men/women you’ve been with, or whether you’ve never been in any real relationships. (I haven’t). There is someone out there for you. You’re definitely not the only single out there in the world. Look around you! Look at your friends. Look at the people on the streets. Do you think you’re the only person who is single in this world? Of course not! There are 7 billion people in the world. For every couple you see out there, there are multiples of other singles. For every single you see, there are even more singles.
There is someone out there for you. I’m as convicted of this for myself as much as I am for you. Just because you are single now doesn’t mean you will remain forever single. It just means you have not found the right person. Meanwhile, focus on living your best life in your definitions. Most importantly, remember that your life doesn’t and shouldn’t hinge on having a special partner or not. "我认为机器会比人类更强大、更智能，但绝不会比人类更睿智。"马云如是说。“因为有一件事是肯定的：智慧、灵魂和心灵都是人类所拥有的东西，而机器永远不能享受失败、成功、友谊或爱情。”
How To Know When You Have Moved On
Getting sector calls right was the least of any investor’s problems this year because, outside of the brilliance of U.S. stock gains, the lights were off around the world.
以100亿港元（合12.9亿美元）购入大新金融中心(Dah Sing Financial Centre)的中国光大控股(China Everbright)，只是过去一年里在香港大举购置总部大楼的众多内地企业之一。
Today as I look back, it has truly been a long, long healing process. Today, I’m finally at peace with myself. I no longer beat myself up or think myself as not good enough when it comes to love and relationships. I don’t have the same trepidation, confusion, bittersweet emotions, hatred or frustration when I think/talk about G. I’m thankful for having crossed paths with G and gaining this experience. I believe all of us enter into each others’ lives for a reason. This experience has helped me become a better person. I’m happy for him and what he has done/achieved for himself, and I hope he is as happy in his life as I am now.
As I mentioned at the start of this series, I have written this with the intention to help others move on from whatever they may be holding back on. We can have pain and sadness from an experience, but there’s always a way out. It’s up to us on whether we want to swirl around in the past or move to a better place. We always have a choice. It’s easy to choose the former. It takes courage to take the latter step. But I assure you it’s worth it.
那些原本希望今年凭借战术策略获得些利益的财务顾问和资产配置人员，也在反复无常的市场中栽了跟头。全美前三位的战术策略产品中，有两款产品几乎因为高达两位数的亏损而崩盘，还有一款产品则因为向公众误报自身历史回报率而受到美国证交会调查。另一家战术产品巨头嘉信理财旗下90亿美元的Windhaven Diversified Growth产品，2014年的回报率几乎为零。战术策略原来不过如此。
Bank of China posted earnings per share of Rmb0.56, down from Rmb0.61, and a pre-tax dividend per share of Rmb0.175, down from Rmb0.19 last year.
Americans: While you're here, why not pretend to be Canadian? Very few Britons can tell the difference, and it will allow you to rescue yourself from awkward conversations about the death penalty.
The auction house says seven records in all were set at the Geneva auction including the highest amount ever paid for a yellow diamond - $16.3 million for the 100.09-carat Graff Vivid Yellow diamond ring.
German Three:Mercedes-Benz begins to sag as new lower-priced Benz’s inevitably erode its once invincible “the best or nothing” status. At BMW, imminent arrival of a new 7-series cements its status as the preferred brand of Scarsdale, Shaker Heights, and Santa Monica. A new A3, starting at $30, 795, should nicely lift Audi’s sales beyond 2014’s 15% climb, and a new Q7 SUV should nicely lift profits.
Are you ready for a summer scare? Conjuring 2: The Enfield Poltergeist is set to hit the screens on June 10, 2016. We reckon that this is going to be a good horror movie.
由美国演员Jared Leto领衔的“火星三十秒”拿到了最佳另类音乐奖，同时还有Lana Del Rey，Lorde，The XX和Imanine Dragons等人提名。
Don't mistake the lack of a late flurry for an uneventful deadline:
I realized that heartfelt sharing of my personal experiences is key to connecting with you guys, so I’ll continue to do that in the future. However, there is going to be tricky, especially as sharing of my personal experiences will sometimes include sharing about other people in my life. So far, K and G are the only individuals I’ve written about in detail on my blog. Based on what I know of K and G, they wouldn’t mind me writing about the stories if it helps people move to a better place. (Something that I later confirmed with them both.)
The report shows Cases of dishonesty connected to e-commerce platforms and enterprises, logistics companies, third-party payment platforms and consumers in a five-day period from Nov 11 to 15 increased 57.49% compared to last year.
2. Don’t fantasize about big brother: I am only legend.
A child's eye view of life in a Florida motel community.
2015年英国《金融时报》全球高管工商管理硕士课程(Global Executive MBA，简称全球EMBA)排行榜由于两个原因而引人注目。不仅因为这是英国《金融时报》发布的第100个商学院排行榜，也是因为今年首次有一个主办方包含一所中国内地商学院的项目拔得头筹。
《患难与共》(Togetherness)，HBO，1月11日播出。HBO台的周日晚间喜剧组合中已经有了20出头的纽约女人（《都市女孩》[Girls]第四季第一集将在同一天晚上播出），还有快到30岁的旧金山男同性恋（《寻》[Looking]也在当天开播第二季）。现在又来了30多岁的洛杉矶异性恋者们。这部有点阴郁的半小时喜剧来自杰伊(Jay)和马克·杜普拉斯(Mark Duplass)，兄弟俩曾经合拍过《肥大的椅子》(The Puffy Chair)和《纸袋头》(Baghead)等诡异的电影。马克·杜普拉斯和梅兰妮·林斯基(Melanie Lynskey)饰演一对夫妻，和杜普拉斯最好的朋友（史蒂夫·齐西斯[Steve Zissis]饰演）与林斯基的姊妹（阿曼达·皮特[Amanda Peet]饰）合住一栋房子。
Comparatively, the increase rate is higher than income rise of urban residents for the same time period, which is 17.4%.
The winter holiday season will help thin the herd, but the true litmus test will be when a company can introduce a wearable that passes the “turnaround test,” Gilbert says—when a person walks a few steps from their front door and decides to turn around to retrieve a forgotten wearable device like they would a forgotten wallet, keys, or phone.
Mila Kunis just keeps on raking in those sexy titles.
迷你剧集/电影类最佳男演员：考特尼?B?万斯(Courtney B Vance)，《美国罪案故事：公诉辛普森》(The People v. O. J. Simpson: American Crime Story)
Exports declined 6.9 per cent in October from a year earlier, deteriorating from the 3.7 per cent fall the previous month as weak global demand and higher Chinese costs led to slumping shipments of the cheap Chinese goods that have flowed to the world in the last decade.
It's a tall order, but if you want to go after one of the thousands of supply-chain jobs that are going begging, a solid start would be logistics training, available at many colleges and universities. Some programs, like Penn State's graduate certificate in supply chain management, are offered online.
Get the manifesto version of this article: 国庆长沙买房记：北上深打拼者回乡置业
Update Sep 2013: About three years after I wrote this post, I found and got together with my true soulmate and husband. Read our love story and how you can meet your soulmate in life: How To Find Your Soulmate (7-part series)
This is the last part of my 5-part series on how to move on from a relationship.
- Part 1: 在9月初发布的另一份报告中，世界气象组织(World Meteorological Organization)称，2013年大气中的二氧化碳水平，比工业革命之前的普遍水平高出42%。其他重要的温室气体含量也有所增加，与前工业化时代水平相比，甲烷增加了153%，一氧化二氮增加了21%。
- Part 2: 今年8月，来自托雷维耶哈的乔斯·哈维尔创建了一个AdWords账户，这是谷歌旗下的一项点击付费服务。
- Part 3: Song “Friends Forever” (Yang Kun and Zhang Liangying)
- Part 4: 瞭望｜雄安新区“新”在何处
- Part 5: 房价下跌引发系统性风险吗？调整是大概率事件
This is part of my Single & Finding Love series:
- 公积金贷款将延续放松态势 楼市回暖尚需时日
- 淡季压力显现 上海二手房环比跌幅增加
- 西安一楼盘摇号前疑似被内定 后续：区纪委确认有公职人员打招呼
- 《the Post》
- 二手房市场刚需主导 降价成交仍是主流 (5-part series)
- How To Find Your Soulmate (7-part series)